Sunday, January 20, 2008
Only a few weeks into 2008 and I had some good self-evaluation time. My therapist says I should learn to take 15 minutes each morning for me...and that has been really awesome. I am also learning to really love my Friday & Saturday nights at home, in bed early, ready to get up for training the next day. I am doing about 10 hours a week right now, and it will only go up from there. 2008 is about finding balance.
I am not a person who feels obligated to write out who I am; however in all the reflecting that has come my way lately I am going to blog on for the sake of my own bewitchment.
I am a truly blessed person. This isn't a new idea or something that I have just come to realize, but as I was talking to a good friend on the phone this past week I had this overwhelming surge of emotion in regards to the friends, the opportunities and travels. I want to learn to be more thankful for it all on a daily basis.
I have learned that the only way to live is Wild!! It is a deliberate act of revolution. And it means that each day I should choose to WAKE UP! I am finding that by embracing my true self and studying my patterns I am letting out my MOST alive self! I am seeing that when I wake up to other souls around me, they affect me and I live that much more.
Those that know me for even just a minute will be able to tell that I am an extremely emotional person. (right Josh?!) This can be good and this can be bad. I cry just as much as I laugh out loud. I feel deeper and have many tools that help navigate me through tough times. I am complex, stuffed FULL of feelings, memories, half-truths, denials, hopes and dreams. All of this 'stuff' is what drives me to create from my heart. And I have found, my deepest pain is often my highest muse.
I absolutely LOVE seeing my friends succeed, I embrace seeing them learn new things and grabbing onto change. It ignites me to see those around me LIVE life rather than EXIST in it. I write this only because I have recently had a time with someone who cannot be like this and chooses every day to get up and just be angry (and mean). Life will continue to be hard and questions will remain unanswered. Your life path will not be clear unless you can move away from jealousy. Jealousy is no more than feeling alone against smiling enemies. Rest assured, I will continue to smile.
I LOVE people that dare to be different and as I look at those that are close to me, I am blessed to have a great selection of outrageous friends! They are the one's that would never allow me to sleep walk through life and are ok with the WILD and when I am in a dark place, they sit with me and see me recover and then discover all those truths again.
"When you walk to the edge of all the light you have and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown you must believe one of two things will happen: There will be something solid for you to stand upon, or, you will be taught how to fly!!"
I am blessed because I have both. Those that provide the solid ground and others that move me to fly!!